Victoria Maria - part 2

I purposely ended last post talking about Blessed Maria Vittoria de Fornari Strata. I hope I was clear in my intent to show how I didn't plan for my Victoria Maria to be born on the death anniversary of Bl Maria Vittoria! Actually, I want to write a bit more about the process of choosing our baby's name.

Much before knowing the gender of our baby, Dan and I had selected two names for her in case she were to be a girl. Victoria Maria (which was one of our top choices for a couple of years already) and Lavinia Maria. If the baby were to be a boy, we were pretty much clueless as to what name him. We try to find names we really like that have the same spelling in english and portuguese. This is slightly easier for girl names, we've found out.

Anyway, for a while we really considered calling our baby Lavinia. But there were a couple of problems to it but I will attend to just one of them. The situation was that people I personally talked to about choosing the name Lavinia tended to think we made the name up! And there are few things I dislike more than made up names.

So it was kinda settled, Victoria Maria was our name for a girl. But what if it was a boy? So here I go trying to find inspiration on the saints. I looked for December saints. No clues for boy names there, but what I found out was that in December, precisely, there was a martyr St Victoria (from the early church) and there also was this Blessed Maria Vittoria. I didn't pay much attention to the feast days because they didn't match our December, 17th due date anyway, but it was enough for me to really stick with our chosen name, if it were to be a girl.

Fast forward to when I had already scheduled my last appointment, the last week my mom was here, we were eagerly waiting for baby Vicky to come out, but she wasn't showing any signs of coming out anytime soon. I thought to myself: "I'm starting to think this is all because of that Blessed Maria Vittoria. but when was it that she died? I can't remember". So I look it up again, there it was: December, 15th.

And sure enough, that's when our Vicky was born.

I will now finally describe the labor and delivery, because - like Dan told me - you might also be thinking that I wrote and wrote, but I said nothing on my last post! haha

Okay, so here it goes.

I went to bed at around 9pm or even before. At 11pm I felt the first contraction and it was already a little painful. It woke me up from my light slumber. I took a print screen of my phone with the time on it. Went back to sleep. The contractions kept coming, but in a random fashion. I would take another print screen and went back to sleep. At 1:45am I started having painful contractions every 12 min apart.

After one hour, I woke Dan to let him know we would probably be going to the hospital some time soon. But I let him sleep a bit more. After a short while, I got off bed, brushed my teeth, changed clothes. At around 3am I called L&D telling them a bit about my situation asking them if I should head to the hospital at that time.

My contractions! The second picture on the bottom line shows my call to labor and delivery

Big mistake! Although I was VERY sure I was in labor already, and the contractions were really painful, the person who answered my call replied with the go-to answer that the contractions should be close to 5 minutes apart. But of course she added that if I was feeling really uncomfortable we could come to triage. Well, that's something too subjective for my math/objective brain to deal with. Was I too uncomfortable? I don't know!!!!

So I waited a little longer. But the pains were bad. To make things worse, I even had some contractions skip the 12 min period so it all seemed a bit off and not too regurlar. But my guts told me to make it official and to wake my mom up so she could take care of the sleeping kids. Then I woke Dan up. I went out to the garage to start our car so it could heat a little bit before we go. By then everybody was up, including the children! Nice! Let me add that the children were sick. Real nice. And easy.

but they look adorable!

playing soccer at 4am.

Dan and I left for the hospital! The car was still cold but I wasn't thinking much about it! I thought I had a few contractions that were 7 minutes apart. I remember telling Dan: "I don't care what they tell me at triage, I'm not leaving that hospital". But there was no need for such drama and impositions of my own. Entering the front desk, Dan already pulled a wheel chair for me. And I must have done a really painful face at some point because when somebody was ready to take us upstairs they already put me in a delivery room, not the triage booths. We entered the room at 4:15am.

Nurses kept coming to settle me in. One of them checked my cervix: "oh, eh, she is 7, 8cm dilated. No cervix on this (left side) and a tiiiny bit left on that side (right side)". I cried: "I knew it". Doctor was already in the room, I think. We briefly discussed my options. I decided to have the epidural anyway. Something we talked about made me think it was worth it, although it wasn't guarantee the baby would wait for it or that it would be totally efficient.

So first thing to be done was to settle an IV for fluids. And then things got too adventurous. Trying to stay positive and polite here! Long story short, after 20 min, 3 nurses, 6 pokes and 3 blown out veins, they finally got an IV on me! And I'm not exaggerating one bit. I can surely assure you that it wasn't the best time to waste precious 20 minutes just to hook up an IV. The doctor visited me a couple times to tell me that if I felt an urge to push we would just stop everything and have the baby!

She also checked me again and I was 9cm dilated already. My water was still intact. She also told me: "I know you must be really struggling now, but you really don't show it. Most women at this stage are already screaming". Not exactly comforting, I tell you, specially when I was still waiting to get my epidural in.

these pictures show my bruises one week after delivery

this one I actually just hurt again today while making the bed....

Miraculously, I wasn't making any sound out of pain, I was controlling my contractions, baby was holding up. Then the anesthesiologist came (ps. I just have to kudos myself for writing "anesthesiologist" down without auto-correct at first try!). And there goes another 20-30 minutes just waiting for the epidural process to be settled down. The nurse kept telling him: "she is 9cm dilated but her contractions are 4/5 minutes apart. That's the only thing that's backing us up now".

The epidural hadn't kicked in yet, but the doctor broke my water. No meconium! I cried of relief a little bit! Then it all happened too fast. Four or five nurses and the doctor all around me, it was time to push. I could still feel the contractions. The monitor was of little help. It seemed to me that everything was under my half-numb-body control and blundering discernment. "did I just have a contraction?"- "hum, we can try to push". Or "I think we just lost a mini one" (mini one?? Was that a thing?).

I really don't know exactly what happened but it seemed to me it took an eternity for baby to crown. I started crying: "I can't do this. I can't push." I felt too numb. On Becca's and Nico's delivery I proud myself I was able to successfully push even with the epidural. But not with Vicky. They explained to me because I was so far along they gave me the strongest and fastest epidural, so something about that made pushing too hard for me.

I asked them if I could do a weird motion with my hands on the air to help my brain visualize the pushing movement. They said "sure". And then it worked a bit. Doctor said: "I don't know what you did there, but keep doing it because this push was much better the all the other ones you did so far". And then a little later, baby was crowning. And then 2, 3 more quick pushes and I felt the whole baby coming out, but apparently I didn't know that was it:

Me: "Aaah, what was that?"
Doctor: "IT'S YOUR BABY"!!

All I know baby Vicky was ready in my arms practically right away. We did skin to skin, she nursed. I talked to her about our family. That she will love her sister Becca because she is so much fun! Vicky was too sweet. Too content. Too alert. Too perfect.

Nurse 1: "Aw, she is so calm"
Nurse 2: "Oh third babies, they have to be".

And Vicky surely is a very good baby!

But part 2 ends here!
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Victoria Maria - part 1

I like traditions! And because I like traditions I should write how baby Vicky came about because that's what I do!

Also because I like to keep track of things so I know where to go back to in case I need some information or reference in the future! I'm thinking about baby number four already or even if it's just somebody asking me for advice!

Anyway, I think there were a few sentences I said the most in this pregnancy. They were:

"I'm not feeling well." - Dan can attest to this one, mournfully, I'm sure.
"This baby is going to come early" - if by early I mean less than two days before my due date, and only after my doctor stripped my membranes..... Vicky is a joker, I tell you.

And:

"It's amazing how much you forget from one pregnancy to the other." -  And I used to attribute the fact that it's been almost four years since I was pregnant with Nico.

But last Sunday after church, waiting for daddy to pick me up at the curb because it was freaking cold (and it was also raining) to walk to the car with baby Vicky (in her covered infant car seat), I started talking to a mother of three. We asked each other about how many kids each of us had and their spacing.

People everywhere say my kids spacing is GREAT. Rebecca and Nico are 2 years and 7 months apart and Nico and Vicky are 3 years and 9 months apart.

And while I will not be stubborn to disagree I saw some advantages to it, I'm usually not a big supporter of our spacing. I always wished Rebecca and Nico were at least 6 months closer to each other, and almost four years between Nico and Vicky is already asking of me for a fourth child in the very near future so Vicky won't feel so lonely when Nico starts school next year.

So no, I'm not a fan of our spacing. But people usually think it's perfect. And so did the mom of three I was talking to after church. She had one of those 2 under 2, 3 under 3 spacing. So I replied to her with my go-to sentence, "the problem with our spacing is that you forget how everything is done.". But then she said she has been feeling the same way with baby number 3 too, calling her mom about things and having her mom say to her: "it's not your first kid, your know?"

So I guess it's just pregnancy brains, cubed.

FYI, pregnancy brains just don't go away with the pregnancies. They stay with you (forever?) to make you company!

So yeah. Pregnancy brains cubed and counting. I really need to write things now or I'll forget everything again.

Interestingly enough, baby Vicky and her birth turned out to be everything I didn't prepare/expect for. Last start talking about how I progressed at 32 weeks and then at 34 weeks.

By my 32 weeks appointment I was feeling the baby so low in my pelvis that I couldn't even wear my pregnancy pants anymore. I would also have terrible back pains after a regular day of chores around the house. Driving was really hard some days. I was having contractions. And carrying heavy Nico when he refused to walk in the middle of the parking lot or some place else was making me think baby Vicky was in for a pre-term delivery, FOR SURE. A killer mix of  "I'm not feeling well" with "this baby is going to come early".

Also, premie babies scary me. Because I already have very petite full term babies, imagine a premie. NICU stays scary me. I don't think I could handle the separation anxiety I would feel for sure. And a ton of other fair reasons.

So I asked my doctor to check me at 32 weeks. I was 1cm dilated and 20% effaced. So not too bad! It gave me comfort that everything I was feeling was actually normal. But at my 34 weeks appointment, my doctor was the one who wanted to check me. I said oookay. And then I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced. OMG, I freaked out. My doctor thought it was best to give me two doses of steroids shots just in case and, talking to Dan, we decided it would be best for me to stay in partial bed rest.

And then I had my 35 weeks appointment. And then came the 36w, 37w, 38w and the 39w appointments. And I was still 3/3.5cm dilated and 80% effaced. And - mind you - I was no longer in bed rest from my 37.5w mark, already.

At my 38w appointment my doctor asked me if I wanted to have my membranes stripped to help start labor. I said not that week, but maybe the next, because I thought as soon as I get on the go when my mom gets here, baby Vicky would promptly make her debut. Well, my mom arrived around those days and we went to a lot of different stores and places and I even did all the driving myself, look at that! But baby Vicky was probably thinking it was too cold outside to come out.

I also realized I failed to schedule a 39 weeks appointment because of, surely,  "this baby is going to come early". And when I tried to schedule it last minute I could only fit later on the next week, mere four days before my mom comes back to Brazil. Yikes. Think about presumption and regrets.

I started to freak out a bit. I actually added a fourth most said sentence to my above mentioned repertoire: "baby Vicky is not coming out anymore". I prayed to the Immaculate Conception, and then to Our Lady of Guadalupe! Surely baby Vicky was just waiting to be born in a super special Mary Feast day. But nope! I even headed to triage on the evening of December 12th for the hall of shame pregnancy episodes of them all: the false labor experience!

So it was finally time for my next appointment, December 14th, Wednesday, at 3pm. I had my membranes stripped and we even scheduled an induction for the next day in case I was still not in labor by then.

But by 11pm that same evening, my first labor contractions started.

Thursday, December 15th came! The day Bl Maria Vittoria de Fornari Strata passed away. And also the feast day of a St Cristina (my mom's name!).

End of part 1.
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Fall and Heartwarming things!

Things we have been doing since - well - since my last post! Not the last previous post. I mean the last post I posted about "what we have been doing". Thinking about it, that might actually be the title of the post. Now I'm curious. Let me check. No, I'm wrong. The title was actually What's Up.

Anyway! Good that I checked, because that made me aware that I need to report about September and October, so far!

A few things pop into my mind, immediately!

Pool season and city summer activities were over by the end of August. Kids were sad! Specially about the pool thing. Nico still asks about it every time we drive by one of the pools:

"Pool empty?", "No water?", "Too cold?" are the usual words he keeps repeating.

At least it got better from his first reaction to the end of pool season: "Poooooool. Pooooool" (read: boy crying and insisting we go to the pool. Rain or shine, hot warm or cold, everytime!!!) Yep. Nico is 3.5yo and he is not totally verbal, yet! But for our family that's normal! Now that we know Rebecca is actually quite smart and she didn't speak until 4-4.5y (and her progression in this area is still slow), I don't worry much anymore!

So no more pool! I guess we all got that right by now! Let's talk about something else then!

Back to school! We managed to enroll Rebecca in the closest catholic school, and what a blessing it has been! I just don't worry about a lot of stuff I used to every minute she's at school! First grade is a whole lot more serious, but I think she enjoys the challenge and the extra responsibility! Rebecca at school and Rebecca learning amaze me, every single day! Nico misses her a lot! Me too, actually! There was a time I needed to send Rebecca to school for my own sake/sanity! Not anymore! Now things are actually easier when she's around the home! That cutie-pie!

Bonus point: get to see her at school Mass!

Bonus point 2: Rebecca wearing uniforms! I die!

Helping at Mass. Yes, she is petite! And they are all giants!

At grandparents day - but with mom, dad and Nico, instead! She is still our happy girl!

Contrary of a bonus point: At the school playground there is an area with SAND. Every day her socks are super filthy (but our laundry machine is great) and her shoes!!!!!! Let's just say that I'm pretty sure little by little (or not so little) - all that sand will ended up in my trash bin. She loves sand! She was telling me that she actually doesn't play with her classmates during all 3 recesses! Why? Because they don't play in the sand! And this was our actual conversation one day:

Me: "Well Becca, you see, most girls your age don't like to play in the sand, maybe because it's so dirty!"
Rebecca: "Well, this girl does!" - smiling and point both thumbs at her chest!

Aaaw, ok! Be happy, my girl! I can manage the dirt! I strongly dislike it, but I can manage it!

Oh, and don't you worry, Rebecca has a best buddy who also loves sand during recess, Lea, from kindergarten! And one day we were at a school-bash event plus book fair (we always let her buy one book every year, usually from her pocket money). We were enjoying great (and free) hot dogs, chips, cookies and lemonade and that's when we finally met Lea! Boy, are they alike! What a duo!

At the school bash/book fair event! Very cool! No, that's not Lea! That is E, a classmate. 

Right! A few other things!

At the beginning of September we visited an Apple Orchard (apple farm!).Our first time doing so! I knew it was a thing here in Sioux Falls so we had to go! We are a very economical family, I'd like to believe, so we managed to pull out a day of fun with very little spending! In our current conditions I hardly doubt Dan and I would enjoy a day of entertainment if it ends up hurting our wallet too much! It would compromise our fun! So we choose! We didn't have lunch at the Family Apple festival, but I bought a snow cone for Nico (the boy loves sugar) and me, while dad watched over Rebecca so she could enjoy the inflatables (we choose to buy one inflatables wristband, just for her). Then when it was time for apple picking, we purchased the smallest bag. In the end, a lot of little apples fitted into that tiny bag (who knew? We didn't!) and the experience was awesome! E-ve-ry-one loved it!

Kids stare at Dan.... Maybe Dan looks different! And my fat face! It comes in free during pregnancy!

September included a lot of doctor's appointments:
- We took Nico to check his ears once (no infection luckily).
- Rebecca had her 6-yo well-child check up.
- Rebecca had her follow-up appointment with her growth-specialist endocrinologist doctor. Everything is checking up fine, so far! Actually, doctors are really thinking she will be somewhat of a late bloomer like her mama - although probably still on the small side. Her hand x-rays and her growth velocity curve indicate that! And it matches my own history. And all her blood work is fine. Now the doctor said that just one visit per year - instead of two - is necessary).

And

- I had my 28-29w appointment: 2 vaccine shots, 1 RhoGam injection (blood type O- here and both kids A+ blood type - like most people from Japan), a Gestational diabetes test and a blood draw! What an appointment! I always get anxious about this one! My maternal grandpa had diabetes so I always fear for myself!. In the end, it was a relief to know I don't have GD, but..... my blood sugar was actually too low. That doesn't necessarily mean I have hypoglycemia, but the nurse made sure to tell me that I need to remember to eat every couple of hours! Which makes sense because every time I don't do it, I feel very weak and nauseated.... And there are not many snacks I feel like eating... nothing store-ready sounds appetizing. I like plums! They were helpful. But plum season days are mostly gone by now. Sandwiches are cool - I ate sooo many of them, but sometimes I lack the energy of preparing one myself. I know I can't complain. I have food to eat! I'm growing a healthy baby, giving another beautiful soul a chance to live her own life! I mainly write these things here in case I have more babies (and we hope so) and I need to remember what happened in my previous pregnancies! It really surprises me how much I forgot about my other two pregnancies! Sometimes I really feel like a first-time-pregnant woman. But with a "3-times mom" pregnancy brain.

At 7 months pregnant! In one of the few clothes that still fit me well!

Let's just wrap up the whole pregnancy report, shall we? I'm 32 weeks now and my next appointment is this coming Friday, October 28th! Then, I should be seen every other week, I think. Baby Vicky is my strongest kicker, so far! And she is very active! Which doesn't come as a surprise, really! At 29w she was already measuring 1.5w smaller, but that's the usual with my babies. Most days than not I worry about pre-term labor. But I hope it's just me being paranoid. And a nice discovery today showed me that one of my only two pregnancy pants don't fit me anymore. Amazing! And the other one is not very comfortable. Oh well. I wore yoga pants to Sunday Mass yesterday! Don't fret, I covered my butt with a long dress-shirt. Very fancy!

We finally bought everything we needed. We have a newborn crib, a nice pack-and-play that it's not so hard, a brand new car seat, a car seat cover (gotta have it during heavy winter!), a new baby bath tub. We don't have a baby stroller. I figured I won't be venturing myself with baby out during winter till mid spring. And there is still Nico to worry about, because he would still be home with us until mid next year. We got rid of our old double stroller and a new, good one, is out of question for at least a good while. So... we'll see. And we don't have a crib anymore. Eventually after six years, the only crib we got didn't survive Rebecca and Nico's relentless jumping play. I know we need a crib of some sort for later on but we'll see about it too, when the time comes.

Now let's talk about October! We visited a super gorgeous and charming Christmas Tree farm. They were hosting a Fall Festival with free inflatables, tractor rides to their pumpkin patch, free games, free peanuts! We didn't buy our lunches there, but that would have been fine because everything was very affordable and we would love to contribute somehow. But we ended up getting there too early and leaving before lunch. But weather, place and entertainment were top notch! Next year we hope to be back for lunch - and I will also buy a bottle of the local fruit wine! This time I even passed the free samples....

That's what I talked about choices too! We planned we would have one family- somehow local - entertainment like this per month. So we budget for that!

Growing Christmas Trees

See? To early for lunch!

I want to buy these flowers for our front yard next year! Gorgeous!

Dan and I also enjoyed some free babysitting at the gym for a few Saturday nights. Not that we had budget for that but our free babysitting days will be over when baby Vicky gets here because they only take kids 3yo and older, who are already potty trained, so..... all of our couple's entertainment is coming from our savings but it's something we can only take advantage of now! We went to the movies once (watched Finding Dory - I LOVED IT!!!!!!), went to a japanese restaurant (with groupon) another time, went to Chili's (I love their endless salad and soup combo, the best enchilada and loaded potato soup ever) followed by a trip to the neighbor bookstore. One other time we didn't feel like eating out but Rebecca wanted to go the gym and play so we let them stay there. And there was another time we were late for our movie (ben-hur) so we missed it. We ended up going home to eat junk food and watch Once Upon a Time. But we actually felt weird about staying home with no kids.... we missed them, so after just one episode we picked them up!

And of course! Carrie Underwood show!!! Because of the duration time of the show, we had to pay for babysitting this time, but boy!!! What a life experience that was! First, let me just say it was my first show ever! And we were sitting so close to the stage! And she is a power house! What a voice! Dan snatched the tickets through his work and some upper connections and it was a surprise gift for our 10th dating anniversary! I always wanted to see her singing live! And Dan made my dreams come true! At the end, Dan who was not so familiar with many of her songs, left the show even more star-struck than me, haha! He now says she is his new idol! But Dan, my dear, I would appreciate if you'd learn more lyrics other than "All-American Girl" to sing everyday..... every hour.

Just kidding, not really, luv you, babe!! And thanks!!!!!!!

A few last things, we finally visited the local farmers market and it's so cool! I promise that if one day we have more spare money I will only buy my vegetables and fruits, organic and local!

And we also visited a state park nearby and we found out - by accident - about a beautiful and quiet lake recreational area, also nearby!

And we still take the kids every weekend to parks and playgrounds!

We hope to go fishing here next year!

And I also hope we'll be able to afford a boat in the not so long future!

You probably can't tell, but on the back there are beautiful brown cows drinking the lake water.

The state park! Seems very promising with lots of trails and bordering the Iowa River, but 32w pregnant mom was an impairment to the rest of the team! We didn't venture too far!

Finally, one word about Fall: WHAT???

Gosh, it is beautiful! Everyday a new scenario. Thank you God!

Aren't we lucky we have TWO maple trees - plus some other two trees in our back yard? I thought you would agree so!

Now I'm really finishing this post! Really! But one last thing! About the heartwarming part I mentioned on the title!

Is Rebecca again! She is a great, great, big sister! And a big helper to mama. Her heart enlightens us! We don't know how we ended up being in charge of such a precious soul. I'm never one to deny the struggles that exist too, but for today - I will concentrate in her virtue, only!

helping Nico - thus helping mommy - at the playground

Reading to Nico! My kids love to read, and Nico loves that Becca reads to him! I am BLESSED!

Everyday daddy takes her to school and they pray in the car! And Dan tells me she always prays for the "poor people". Dan suggested that when she'll be a bit older we take her to help with food banks, or something. I sure hope we can do something like this!

I pick Rebecca up from school, and there is a Perpetual Adoration Chapel by the church on our way to the parking lot. She always asks me to take her there after school. We pray three Hail-Marys and one Glory.

And when we are praying together, she also prays for all the animals that have died and all the babies that have died!

I can't!

Our little garden roses! They are still up and running even after some frosts!

xoxo

The Story of Us - part 8

Wow! When I posted the link for the "Story of Us - part 7" yesterday on my facebook, I didn't even realize that was actually the last post I have written in english about our love story! But I actually wrote two extra ones (part 8 and part 9) in portuguese. I'm planning on first to translate these two posts to english, and then write a new one (part 10) about our 10th (the numbers even match! Look at that!) dating anniversary (which was yesterday, September 21st, 2016).

So first things first, here it is the "Story of Us - part 8" in english! But I'll change some things (typical me! I hope this means I'm an exciting/interesting person... well, maybe let's not go that far!) I'm going to make the first part of the post a whole lot shorter (less details!). In this first part I describe how our celebrations for our 6th wedding anniversary went, back in January 18th, 2015.

We were living in Kingwood (Houston area). My brother babysat the kids for the very last time before returning to Brazil (at that time he was living temporaly in College Station, TX). Let me just add that the kids love Tio Rafa (aka uncle Rafa). Nico still mentions him every now and then for random reasons! We even included him in our "Rain, rain go away" song (he is the middle finger because he is so tall and he is also the third in age in this family if we include him). We have a picture on the wall of my kitchen with five teacups stacked, and one of them was for Tio Rafa. We still call our guest room "Tio Rafa's room". Sweet! Unfortunately for him, he is about to lose his spot on the "rain, rain go away" song and the 5th teacup in the picture on the wall to baby Vicky! And the "tio rafa's room" will have to turn into the "guest room" because we'll be having new visitors arriving soon! But we still talk to tio Rafa on skype every once in a while and the kids will always have a soft spot in their hearts just for him! (ps. We are trying to convince him to come find an engineer job here in Sioux Falls so he can live near us!)

But anyways! Back to 2015, Dan and I left the kids with tio Rafa and we headed to Houston for a fancy dinner date at tres chic french (you guessed it!) restaurant, Etoile Cuisine at Bar! I wanted to try for the first time a lot of foods and Dan was excited to see me so excited! We had reservations and all. We dressed up to our best looks and we were preventive conformed ahead of time about our predicted $100 bill. We were looking so silly and so happy when we sat down at the start of our dinner. Then we ordered: seared foie gras, beef tartare, scargot and scallop in truffle oil. And, well... except for the beef tartare that we both loved, all the rest was so... well... yucky! (Dan did enjoy the scallop but I would had preferred it a little bit more cooked and with a little less truffle oil..... and we should have ordered pate of foie gras and not seared itself). I guess the food was too french for us, after all. Or maybe this means we were not born to be rich and live with fancy taste for food. But the whole thing did turn out to be a funny/interesting story to tell people, though! 

We had this date on Friday, but our wedding anniversary was actually on a Sunday. We went to Mass as usual but we managed to get a special blessing from our priest after Mass. It was so nice! A friend took a picture of us four at the church patio and we came back home. As for the food, we decided to stick with a good ol' brazilian dish! 

Now the second part of the post! A little bit of #tbt (and today is actually a Thursday, look at that!).

I want to write a bit about our first days of relationship.

Just to recap our timeline:

- We met for the first time at my friend's house in August 6th, 2006. Gabby has a crush on Dan.

- A few days after, Gabby adds Dan on MSN (online chatting). A few more days later, both are online and start exchanging their first "texts". Gabby's crush had subsided by then.

- But now it's Dan's turn to develop a crush on Gabby.

- September comes and they continue to online chat on MSN. Dan keeps informally inviting Gabby to college parties, Gabby keeps running away of the invites.
- Long story short, they finally meet again at a certain campus party on a Thursday, September 21st, 2006. After one hour of "hide and seek" (hint, Gabby was not doing the "seeking") and after two hours of "talking to each other", they kiss for the first time!
- Monday, Sept 25th. Dan invites Gabby for an ice cream date. He thinks he is going to kiss her again, but not so fast! Gabby had decided she is not doing things that way. They are forced to talk about whether or not they should start dating each other. They agree they should! (But we consider our dating starting date on the 21st of September, not the 25th).

And it's on the following Wednesday, September 27th, that our "Story of Us - part 8" takes place!

We were going out on a "date" and he was about to pick me up at my parents' house for the first time. The "date" was actually a social at a charming bar with some of his friends from the foreigner language learning center Dan used to teach at (he was an english teacher).

By the way, this is a bonus point about him! Dan was a very devout, relentless and responsible working guy! We was financially independent shortly after graduating college, completing his masters studies and working part-time teaching jobs. At some point, he would be teaching in two language schools Monday through Saturday and working on his masters almost daily. And he would still find the time and energy to go out with me at least 3-4 times in a week and pretty soon in our relationship we started having lunch together every weekday. It helped we were both studying at the same university, for sure, and Dan stayed most weekends in Campinas, the city where the university was located and also my parent's hometown. I never "left" for college as I continued to live with my parents. Don't worry, that's not a weird thing in Brazil. Even those who had to leave for college were always visiting their parents quite often on weekends and holidays. Only those who came from really far away wouldn't go home that frequently.

But I was telling about how Dan was going to pick me up for our "date". By the way (2), I never owned a car but Dan did! So he always drove me around, picked me up and dropped me off every time! Always without a single ounce of complaint. And it was quite a detour to my house from where he lived. Dan was always a generous guy, and he wasn't rich, by any means.

Back to our plans for that evening. It was actually a last minute thing and I thought it was so nice of him to invite me to tag along even though we were dating for less than a week. You now when things are simple, no mind games, no guessing each other's minds, just being yourself? That what it felt like to me! He wanted me to go so he just asked me to! So I was getting myself ready when he arrived at my house, but stayed outside waiting for me, like he should. But at the same time, my dad and super tall brothers were also arriving. Well, I didn't have plans to introduce Dan to my family that night, but Dan as the sensible guy he is did just the right thing. He promptly and voluntary went out of his car and firmly shook hands with my father.

Who would have guessed that he won my dad over just because of that! Well, I firmly believe God gives good dads a certain intuition factor that also played a hole on him liking Dan so fast. I was still inside, so I actually only witnessed what my dad said to me and my mom as he entered through the doorway: "the japanese guy seems like a good guy!" My brother (tio Rafa, actually) was not so easily bought and in a kinda suspicious way he decides to add the following to me: "muscly him, no?", like he wasn't sure himself if that was a good thing or not. LOL

Anyways! I am finally at the part when we leave my house to go to the charming bar (charming bars are trendy in Brazil). But it's about the drive back to my house that I want detain myself! Like I said it before, we were dating for less than a week (5 days from the day we first kissed, to be more exact) and my mom can't help herself and calls me on my cell phone asking Dan, my 5-day brand new boyfriend, who she had not met yet, a favor. She wants us to pick up my sister who was attending a late evening class at the university campus (we lived close by). I was totally embarrassed to be asking Dan for this favor, but I did it anyway, because... my mom....

Dan was a gentleman, of course, and said yes, without any apparent complaint, as per usual! So we got to the place where my sis was, about 15 minutes before her class was over! He parked in the front, turned off the car engine, turned to face me and said: "I want to tell you everything about me".

Although now I'm pretty convinced that he was doing the right thing, and being a real, honest, truthful man to me, at that moment I was actually scared! I was scared of what that meant! And indeed, everything he told me was not easy peasy tales. He was six years older than me and had gone through a rough patch in adolescence. He told me everything I needed to know, and even told me about his family situation at that time, how both his parents were living in Japan for a while, etc.

My goal sharing this part of our story is to acknowledge his manhood and honesty! His good intentions with me since the beginning. Also that, sometimes a great person might have a rough past, if they were able to turn those experiences into maturing ones. Also, that sometimes we, good little catholic girls (or boys) just want a good little catholic boy (or girl), and that actually God doesn't choose people! He wants to save everyone. He loves everyone! He wants what is best for everyone and He never gives up on his sons and daughters.

Obviously I'm not saying we can trust everyone, nor that we are going to be able to change everyone. Not at all. You need to recognize if a person has first made a personal decision to change him/herself. It's a personal decision. You should also be able to tell if that person really changed! If it was a true change. And that was Dan. I didn't change him! He recognized his wrong paths and decisions and put a lot of practical efforts to successfully change himself and the situations around him. And that happened many years before we met, actually! Unfortunately, some of his old friends were not so lucky.

Sometimes, even now, I look at how Dan is a great guy, a great husband, a great daddy and I almost can't believe he was that teenager he told me about. But I am forever grateful for the person he is now, and for so many years already. I'm so proud and grateful for the honesty he demonstrated to me so early in our relationship! God is so good!

I am thankful to God that Dan and I are one together in marriage! That we have our family together! This doesn't mean he is perfect, he knows I'm not perfect either! We might struggle every now and then but fortunately it has become more "then" than "now". But most importantly, we continue to fight for ourselves, our family! We share this common feeling that "this" is forever! Which practically means we put effort in our family unity! We apologize to and forgive each other, we run away from temptations that could threaten our family. We teach our kids necessary good principles! We pray as a family! We bring God to our house! And then, our love keeps alive!

Ode a Vó Nelsa

Hoje acabei de colher nosso primeiro tomate! Um tomatinho cereja, vermelhinho. Simplesmente se trata do primeiro tomate que eu já plantei em toda em minha vida! E tudo começou com meras sementinhas plantadas há uns meses atrás, já um pouco avançados na temporada, em um grande pote de terra improvisado como canteiro! É uma sensação incrível essa de plantar vegetais, frutas - e flores também! Confesso que estou me apaixonando por tudo isso!

E contemplando meu primeiro tomatinho (que por sinal estava uma delícia), comecei a pensar em minha querida vovó Nelsa, que infelizmente já partiu dessa vida há muitos carnavais, no ano 2000. Veja só! Até escolher um ano bonito e extremamente singular para nos deixar lhe foi concedido.

Deixou-nos com tantas saudades!

Quero escrever esse post primeiro em português, como presente a minha mãe, mas também quero escrever esse post em inglês para que meus filhos, netos, etc, possam ler e saber sobre essa mulher que tanto marcou a todos que a conheceram!

E vou contar porque meu tomatinho tem tudo a ver com a vovó Nelsa! Oras bem, vou começar contando sobre a chácara que vó Nelsa e vô Adolfo moravam em Valinhos, SP, Brasil. A chácara contava com uma charmosa casa térrea branca de cinco quartos (2 suítes), uma bela cozinha e uma área social bem espaçosa, aberta e conjugada de duas salas de jantar, sala de estar e uma área de luz que tinha porta (de vidro) para o quintal!

Meus pais e meus irmãos (até o Le) no sofá da sala!

Momento pós festa de natal! Essa é a Larinha!

Natal típico na casa da vó! Uma sujeira de embrulhos ficava a cargo dos adultos!
Ah, as samambaias! Quase tinha me esquecido!

Eu e minhas irmãs brincando de massinha entre os sofás da sala de estar. As janelas davam para a piscina!

Festinha de aniversário, que não me lembrava que só acabavam de noite, na sala-luz!

No quintal grande tinha um belo barracão com churrasqueira, bancadas e pias. Também tinha uma longa mesa e bancos que eram frequentemente usados para eventos e reuniões familiares. Também tinha uma mini piscina de criança que quase sempre estava vazia de água por razões de segurança, e também um belo canteiro de areia, favorito da criançada. Tinham também três árvores, uma que eu adorava subir, mas que acabaram por cortar pois alguém deve ter subido e se machucado ou para evitar que alguém viesse a cair! Tinha também um corredor de concreto margeando a casa, e como o terreno era inclinado, adorávamos descer aquele longo corredor em nossos triciclos!

festinha no barracão

olha a árvore que foi cortada, atrás! Também dá pra ver o corredor de concreto que descíamos de triciclo!

a piscininha e o canteiro de areia!

Sou eu! E ali no fundo tinha um porta lateral que dava para a psicina grande na frente!

Essa é minha mãe linda, a Paula, amigos que não reconheço, e a lateral que dava para o vizinho! Adorávamos estourar com os dedos as sementinhas dessas florzinhas aí atrás!

E mais canteiro de areia!

Na frente da casa tinha uma bela piscina e em volta, árvores e arbustos de flores lindas. Contudo, nem comecei a descrever o mais especial dessa casa e que diz muito sobre a minha avó! A horta! Se a piscina me lembra meu querido vô Adolfo que quase todo final de tarde de um dia ensolarado dava uns mergulhos na água antes de voltar para dentro de casa e tomar o seu banho, a horta com certeza era território da minha avó! E que horta!

Onde acabava o quintal tinha um baixo muro que dava para a horta! E na minha cabeça e memória de criança, aquilo mais parecia uma mini selva, pois tinham muitas árvores frutíferas espalhadas por toda a horta - de manga, pitanga, banana, lichia, mexirica e carambola!

Se ainda fosse só isso, já seria impressionante, mas não era "só" isso, não! Ela também plantava suas próprias verduras em longos e perfeitos canteiros! Tinha alface, rúcula e chicória. Acho que também plantava mandioquinha e batata doce. Não me lembro se plantava pepinos japoneses, mas era certo que sempre havia na mesa! (Minha prima acaba de me confirmar que a vó plantava esses pepinos, sim!!)

E para completar, sua horta também contava com um poço que nos era assustador e tinhámos medo até de chegar perto. Também tinha uma larga e funda fossa bem ao fundo do terreno (parecia que tinhámos chegado ao fim - limite - do mundo) em que ela fazia o próprio adubo com restos e cascas do que se era servido em casa. Esse era outro lugar que não podíamos - e nem queríamos - chegar perto!

E, é claro, tinha também sua pequena e sazonal plantação de tomatinhos cerejas!

Que mulher incrível! Como ela tinha tanto conhecimento de horti-fruti será sempre um grande mistério para mim! Por causa de sua horta, ela acordava todo dia bem cedo (acho que antes das cinco da manhã) mas também tirava sua sagrada soneca da tarde! Ia se deitar um pouco tarde de noite pois gostava de assistir tv antes de dormir.

Tudo que ela fazia, ela fazia muito bem feito! Ninguém dobrava toalhas e lencóis como a minha avó, por exemplo! Também costurava! Tinha seu quartinho de costura e na parede um quadro com sua foto em preto e branco - de noiva com o vestido de casamento mais impressionante que já vi, por conta de sua longa extensão, esparramando-se perfeita e cuidadosamente no chão.

Esse era o quadro e ESSE era o vestido!!!

Mas o que provavelmente era sua melhor qualidade como dona de casa, era sua culinária! Sério, eu sei que toda comida de vó é especial, mas a comida da minha avó era em outro patamar! Pode perguntar para qualquer pessoa que já a conheceu, para qualquer amigo de meus pais e tios que já tiveram o privilégio de comer da comida da vó Nelsa!

Ela fazia o melhor molho de tomate. O melhor nhoque de mandioquinha. Ela fazia o melhor frango empanado (coxinhas com osso empanadas com uma massa cremosa divina). Ela fazia o melhor arroz soltinho! Ela fazia o melhor feijão (e sopa de feijão também) capaz de converter todo e qualquer odiador de feijão que possa existir. A melhor mandioquinha frita! As melhores verduras, a melhor salada temperada e sempre farta, com as melhores folhas. Até seus pepinos fatiados longitudinalmente temperados com sal, apenas, eram deliciosos (era normalmente servido para as crianças antes do almoço)! Ela fazia o melhor bolinho de carne do mundo! Ela fazia O MELHOR pão na chapa e café com leite fervendo no copo de vidro! E quem poderia esquecer a INCRÍVEL geléia de jabuticaba que ela sabia fazer e distribuía entre a família!! Os melhores antepastos (antepasto de beringela que não era nem um pouco ardido). E o pickles de cebolinha?

Sorte de quem a conheceu!

Agora, como mulher! Que mulher elegante ostentando o melhor corte de cabelo channel (tipo Jacqueline Onassis). Sempre bem pintados de preto, sua cor natural! Quando se arrumava vestia os mais bonitos e elegantes vestidos tubinho, e na minha memória tem lugar especial o seu vestido amarelo-gema! Uma mulher linda, mesmo em seus 60 anos. Italiana! Perdeu a mãe muito cedo e foi criada pela irmã, pela qual tinha muito carinho! Chegou até a fazer alguns (poucos) bicos como modelo em sua juventude!

Como avó, a mais calorosa que se poderia querer! Chegávamos para a visitar e já era costume sair correndo ao seu encontro, dar um super pulo e a abraçar pendurados e encaixados nela enquanto nos enchia de muitos beijos rápidos e seguidos na bochecha!! Passar a semana, ou alguns dias, durante as férias na casa da minha avó era um evento sempre esperado e muito bem aproveitado! E como não se lembrar de seus segredos? Nos chamava na cozinha individualmente fingindo de maneira teatral que iria nos dar uma bronca, para nos presentear escondidos com batatas fritas quentinhas! Como não gostar de suas "broncas"!

Vó Nelsa partiu muito cedo! E as lágrimas começam a cair ao terminar de escrever esse post!

Sorte de quem a conheceu e mais ainda de quem pode conviver com ela! Sinto pena que o Dani nunca a conheceu! Seriam almas gêmeas, dois perfeccionistas e apaixonados por culinária! Sinto pena que algumas irmãs minhas nunca chegaram a conhecê-la! E que muitos outros irmãos ainda eram muito novos para guardar no coração essas memórias tão especiais, dessa mulher ainda mais especial! Me lembro dela várias vezes na semana! E vez e outra ainda tenho aquela vontade aguda de comer novamente seu pão na chapa e tomar seu café com leite de queimar nossas pontinhas dos dedos ao segurarmos o copo! Tento replicar, nunca consigo!

Vó, você está sempre em meu coração! Mande um abraço e beijo ao vô Adolfo!

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