Friday, January 15, 2016

2015 - Year in Review

Wow! I know when it has been too long since my last post when not even my browser is auto-suggesting my blog's address when I start typing it! Ha.

I finally decided it was time to get back into blogging but checking my last post's title I couldn't even remember writing that. I had to scroll over the post to see what that was all about! Ha.

Ok, I apologize for my absence. It was justifiable but I haven't share the reasons with many people, actually! Slowly as I start posting more posts I can better explain everything that went on with our family in 2015. I hope NOT to get into many details in this posts or it would turn out dreadfully too long. (too late, it is me double checking my writing and this post is awfully long. You might want to read it in parts!)

Ideally, I want to get to a point on which I would share daily short posts, as some sort of a diary! I enjoy having our happenings recorded and I know that's the main reason why I am so active on social media! Every time I pause posting for a while on instagram or facebook, the hardest part for me has always been that I stop taking pictures altogether. Therefore, I miss recording our special little everyday moments. I know, you could argue something is not linked to the other, that I could take pics and just not share them, but I have tried it before and experience tells me different: it just doesn't work for me in that way.

All of these to say that it is thanks to posting pictures (and having a wall calendar) that I can remember what happened in our lives last year! Therefore, I do not have many regrets about being a over-sharer.

Without any more lingering, please find our 2015 retrospective below.

____________

I almost cannot believe that in last January we were spending 10 days with my family in a vacation home in Florida. The memories seem so far away and so much has changed regarding Brazil's economic situation that it is crazy to realize that this was even possible one year ago! We had a blast in Orlando, Fl with the whole family including tia Juju and tio Andre, visiting the Harry Potter (Universal) theme parks. Dan also visited Sea World and Bush Gardens with my brothers as an early birthday present. We enjoyed the game room and the pool a lot and, obviously, my dad's great culinary skills! We also visited St Pete's beach and we (just) passed through the very crowded Clearwater beach.

St Pete's Beach
I love, love this pic!





We went back home to Texas for the rest of January while part of the crew flew back to Brazil. My parents and the rest of my siblings enjoyed a bit more of Orlando, Miami and Key West, Fl. We celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary by going out on a date to a fancy little french restaurant in Houston and I got to try for the first time foie gras (not the pate, tough), escargot and scallops in truffle oil. I didn't like none of the before mentioned. We playfully described our dinning experience as "too french". And of course it was very expensive but we weren't looking at the bill, for a change (or we tried not to). As a bright side, it was nice to dress up for the occasion! It was our first time, actually, having such a fancy date, just the two of us! 


Our 6th wedding anniversary picture - after Mass! 


In the beginning of February we went back to Florida to take care of my siblings while enjoying the Fort Myers/Sanibel Island area while my parents headed to Las Vegas for the annual World of Concrete Conference that my dad usually attends. We LOVED Sanibel! Sanibel FOR SURE is the most beautiful little part of the panhandle. I have been to the Emerald Coast and it is breathtaking when the skies cooperate, but Sanibel Island is almost like a world apart. A village! Full of colors, nature, cool architecture, fancy mansions, narrow streets and bike trails! Pictures don't make it justice, don't even try to google it. I liked the north part of the island better, although it is in the south where you will find the shell beach and the famous lighthouse. I thought it is the PERFECT place for a second honeymoon. Fort Myers it is also very cool, well planned and beautiful! Finally, we visited Siesta Key beach and it is also a very nice place! The sand is the best and there is a LOT of room to play games or just sunbathe.

Fort Myers - Lovers State Park

Siesta Keys Beach


We celebrated Dan's Birthday on the beach, and my birthday shortly after we said goodbye to my family. Normal life finally started to make its way into 2015. In March, we celebrated Nico's birthday! It landed on a Tuesday, that's when I take Nico (Rebecca has school) to Children's Adoration at our church's chapel. I have talked about my love for this holy hour plenty of times before! I have the imprinted certainty in my heart that Jesus loves to see the little children praying in front of Him! I always receive very specific favors on the days I attend Children's Adoration, too.

Since I did not celebrate Nico's birthday very well in 2014, this time I really wanted to throw the little guy a party! But as per usual I was a little bit late on my planning alhtough it worked for the best! I invited my friends from church and their kiddos to go to our house right after Children's adoration and I served lunch and cupcakes. I had in mind that anyone who showed up at the chapel that day would also be invited. It was a very low key and easy going "party" on a plain Tuesday but it couldn't have been more perfect! My heart was filled with joy the whole day. I still remember it.




In April we had our Austin/Fredericksburg/San Antonio a-ma-zing trip! It was the first time we spent our money in a "just the four of us" getaway! It was very worth it. We were missing Austin very much since we used to visit it all the time when we lived in Temple, TX. Austin is naturally beautiful with little hills, parks, lakes and rivers, weird (as you don't have to worry about fitting in) and full of things to do and nice places to eat! People in Austin really enjoy the outdoors and the crunchy mentality. And because of UT and other college campuses, there is a lot of young people! We visited our favorite spots and added a few new places to our "Best in Austin" list: Mozart Cafe, Children's Museum, Torchy's Tacos and finally, Oasis on the Lake. Unfortunately, because of the weather, we couldn't visit the exotic water holes the region is famous for but treat yourself, if you ever have a chance.








In Fredericksburg we visited the historic downtown and spent the afternoon in the beautiful wildseed farm which is GORGEOUS in spring! We enjoyed views of colorful wildflowers fields and its cozy cafe for some snacks. Sweet memories! We decided at the moment to drive back to Houston through an alternative longer way, making a stop in San Antonio! What we didn't expect was the country road between Fredericksburg and San Antonio to be so beautiful! It was a nice treat.
Becca sleepy on the restaurant in Fredericksburg!

Eating Popsicle reminds me so much of my own childhood!
My dad would always buy us popsicles, specially on trips! 




I thought it was very nice they had a Mary garden in the farm! Blessed trip!


In San Antonio we strolled a bit around the riverwalk with the kiddos and stopped at Mi Tierra mexican restaurant at the historic market square. The ambiance is SO fun, although the food was overpriced, with little portions and not that tasty (to me, nothing beats that humble and cheap place in Temple, TX we used to go and love but, unfortunately, I can't remember the name right now... sorry!). We got home in Kingwood VERY late at night and we were totally worn out, but we loved every bit of our trip!






blurry, I know....


In May I had my first tennis practice in years with my friend Brigid! It was a highlight worth of mentioning here (I ended up playing tennis one more time with my good friend Katie in December). But more importantly, my parents visited us in May. They were in New York for my sister and her husband's graduation and with airline's miles (mine and theirs) they made a 4-days stop in Kingwood! We took them to visit Austin (mostly repeating our April visit), and then I took them to my (along with theirs) favorite spots in Houston! It was a blessing to have them with us one last time in that beloved house!
On our first day, eating at Pappasitos Mexican Restaurant!
My mom loved it!


At Oasis on the Lake


I have other dresses too, you know.

At Mozart's Cafe in Austin


My mom's favorite places in the US always included a Whole Foods.
My dad was feeding the kids all the free snacks he could find!
Good timing, because the kids were huuuungry!

Unfortunately, May was also the month of the worst flooding that Houston had ever seen, I believe it was. Lots of damage. Some lost lives. Very sad that exceptional natural disasters surpass our best human efforts and resources.

In June nothing big happened but pool season started and the kids loved to swim with us! Gotta love Kingwood and their village's pools! Pool season lasted well through August and I even ventured taking the kids (solo) to the pool, twice! Rebecca improved her swim a lot and Nico showed us he is a crazy little dude in the water. Gotta hold that squirmy and strong little boy tight!

Sweet girl, new swimsuit!

With daddy is so much more fun! Almost every weekend!

Nico turned out to be pretty shy on his toddler years.
This is a rare moment when he lets his smile be recorded on pictures (pool and snacks are the reasons, of course)!



For the 4th of July we drove to the Kemah Boardwalk to see the fireworks. Advice: don't do it! It was crazy busy!!!!! We spent hours to get out of there on our way back home. BUT, God gave us a little treat in the midst of that craziness. The place was so crowded that when we arrived there we couldn't even get close to the boardwalk. So we parked our car in the packed neighbor streets. It was dark, we were ready to walk by foot to the boardwalk when we saw some local people leaving their houses and we decided to follow them because we thought they should know the better way to get there!

But they were actually going to a "secret" (residents only) passage to a private pier. When we notice this, we asked if that was only for residents, they confirmed it but I guess they felt sorry for us, so lost and with two kids in the dark that they happily invited us in! The place is a hidden gem! You can see all the cities around Kemah, plus the Houston Yacht Club and the boardwalk too. It was very dark so when you looked into the water you could only see a wall of lights. The friendly people who welcomed us explained that those lights were all boats anchored to see the fireworks (you could think it was city lights)! When it finally started, you could see fireworks from all directions! It was a very special moment! God and his little treats to us, always!

Besides the goings to the pool, we enjoyed our summer a lot! I took them a number of times to the local indoor playground (too hot and too many killer mosquitoes to be outside), took them to playdates and to the library. But the high point of the summer for me was that I had the inspiration of taking the kids every other Thursday afternoon (when it's free) to visit all three Houston major museums (Natural Sciences, Children's Museum and Fine Arts). They LOVED it!!!

Learning games on the iPad at the library! We would also get tons of books each time!

Arriving at the Fine Arts Museum on my first endeavor! Mommy was VERY excited!
The children didn't know yet what they were doing there!

I was crazy, honestly speaking, because it is so crowded, and hot outside (you commute from one museum to the other by foot since parking is a pain and they are very close to one another, anyway) and my kids love to run away from me, but it worked so well! They cooperated with my rules, they loved the dinosaurs, our snack times, and - obviously - everything about the children's museum. The Fine Arts Museum they didn't like much, but I did A LOT. We even took daddy with us the other Thrusday so he could have as much fun as we were having. I ended up doing that on three Thursdays, and when we wouldn't go, Rebecca would be upset and cry about it! :) I love that my kids enjoyed it so much, because I was never a big fan of museums growing up and always felt ashamed of this not-so-cult side of me! I love to see my kids experiencing different!
Snack break in the Natural Sciences Museum

Children's Museum. It's gigantic!

Children's Museum

Children's Museum

The Fine Arts Museum has a nice shadow-monsters projections exhibition. But Rebecca was a bit shy about it!


In August, 30th, we celebrated Rebecca's birthday by taking her to the beach! She loooves the beach. And Menchies Fro-yo, and cupcakes and lots of cool and educational engaging toys!


Excited to be talking to our both families in each tablet! We all sang Happy Birthday together!





Meanwhile it was time to be back to school as Rebecca entered Kindergarten (KG). We had a couple of hiccups changing schools in the first week of school but everything calmed down eventually, and Rebecca loved school, as she has always had. Along the first semester, she completely shined and was considered Gifted and Talented by the CoGat test. She scored in the 99 percentile regarding kids of her same age all across the US, and in the 98 percentile regarding kids all ages in her level grade (her teacher even told me that some kids in KG will be turning 7yo before the school year ends) and since Rebecca was born at the end of August - meeting the KG age requirement by mere 3 days -  she is the youngest of the youngest!

Cute

Big little girl!

Her teacher also explained that a child to be considered for further testing (the whole process is only done by february) has to score on the 95 percentile. And that only 6 kids in that school, made it. The second part of the testing was a behavioral questionnaire that her teacher and us, the parents, had to fill out separately.

As her teacher had her questionnaire already finished when she handed mine to me, she said Rebecca was the perfect candidate. When I was filling my questionnaire and reading the introductory list of the characteristic behavior of a GT child, I started crying. It was Rebecca in a shell! Everything that usually requires me so much energy and PATIENCE to deal with her, it was all explained. I always knew she was different, more like a "difficult child". If only I knew that was all a part of something bigger and good, I would have looked at it in a different way as I have done so after learning all of this. I was so, so proud of her! I finally understood her better! And I felt sorry for her and ashamed of myself that it took me so long - and a computer test, to show me this.

And she continued to impress us by learning how to read at 5 years old, in the first months of KG! She loves to read and is very good at it! She is a golden girl! I hope she uses all her intelligence for the great good of others and for God!

About Nico, he started going to MDO and looooved it!!! He developed so much socially! His teachers were all so sweet to him! It was well worth the bucks! But the coolest thing this MDO brought us was to see Nico shaking the maracas according to the song - on stage - along with his classmates and teachers during the MDO Christmas party! Dan and I watched it, and we were in heaven to see our little introspect guy doing so well!



IT WAS SO CUTE I WANTED TO DIE!!!



Nico at the end of presentation. Yes, mommy didn't understand the kids were supposed to dress up in holiday attire. He was the only one dressed in blue! I said he was representing the Virgin Mary because that was a baptist school!
Dan and I also enjoyed both kids being at school at the same time to go out for lunch-dates on a number of days. We enjoyed some restaurants, time together and even a going to the movies (The Hunger Games!!!). What a year!

Menchies date! Oh, we were haaaappy!

The Cheesecake Factory one last time!

Breakfast-date just Dan and I and a milkshake!

Obviously this was only possible because I started working part-time! While totally not the usual between my stay-at-home sweet friends, we had not much of an option. It was never a secret that we live in a very tight budget and that's actually the reason why I'm still not pregnant with our third child yet. Just an observation, I use Natural Family Planning, and it successfully works for us, just like that. You might find it hard to believe but it is true and I don't hide it and have never done so. In fact I will teach about NFP to anyone who wants it, as I find it to be a true blessing in our marriage and in our family!

Besides getting a few more bucks in, having a job taught me a lot about people and specially people in different circumstances of life. I will be forever grateful for this experience and life learning. I had two jobs, actually, one at the church nursery taking care of kids, and the other one on weekday evenings at some retail store. Dan would be back home from work and we would have dinner together as a family, then I would leave for work and he would help the kids be put to bed. It worked great, but it did require me to take daily 30-min naps in the afternoons.

Also thanks to me having jobs, we could visit my sister and her husband in NY. It was sooooooo cool! Every single bit of it! I flooded Instagram and facebook with pictures while we were there so I won't bother sharing the same thing here (specially because is already November in a retrospective post written by Gabby - me! - meaning, of course, that IT IS TOO LONG).







Just to wrap things up, it was a year that I had many friends, many socialization events, parties and get-together's. What a happy year! I never envisioned it to be so great! Thank you God, for the blessings in our life!

It was a year that I was very active on Facebook fighting the terrorist groups of the Islamic State (much before the attacks in Paris), defending the pro-life cause (you "might" remember my countless posts exposing Planned Parenthood and their shady practices. Probably, that's when you decided to stop follow me on FB), publicly talking about the damages of a certain filthy book and movie when you and society are exposed to them, and finally, about Brazil's political and economic situation (that's when another chunk - I would say about 1/8 - of my online friends stopped following me).

FINALLY - congrats to you, my reader, if you made this far - it's the end of the year. And what better way to finish it than to pack all of our things and move to Sioux Falls, SD? What a busy time! But we managed to say our goodbyes although we are sure to forever miss our great friends, our beautiful Kingwood and our lovely, little (just perfect for us) house! Everything was so well taken care by God, I can not even describe it! I feel a lot of gratitude in my heart!

Now some random pics:

Rebecca giving me beauty and fashion tips (really! She chose my dress!).
Dan and I were going to the Celebration of life Gala dinner. 

Rebecca's new way of locomotion in airports - getting a ride in our luggage.
The whole family visit Sioux Falls, SD to look around and search for a house!


Sioux Falls Country Club just behind our hotel!

Merry Christmas!

I wish you all peace! And a grateful heart for the big and little things of your daily life! Every person, every life is different! There is good and there is bad in everything, that's just real world! I wish you can seize what's good and deal with what is bad! I wish you are constantly trying to be a better person - for your own and for others! For me, by doing this, is when you find a way to happiness! And I guess I would be lying if I failed to mention that I TRULY BELIEVE that my family life centered in Jesus, my catholic faith, is what makes us such a happy family (in the midst of all our trials and tryings). Of course we have bad moments - everyday - but in general, I have the peace of a happy home. Of course that's just my experience but I wish all of you peace and happiness too. Sincerely!

xoxo
Gabby






Thursday, August 6, 2015

How to Discipline Children - TWO RULES

Two Simple Parenting Rules

PS. If you are in a hurry, jump to the final part

I have been PMSing for the last ten days and, at the same time, I’ve been struggling about disciplining my petite - almost 5 years old –daughter, Rebecca. We had it rough since the beginning of this week but I guess I have been noticing a sudden change of behavior since Summer School ended mid-July. As I was telling my mom two days ago through Skype, it seems to me like she is going through a new phase of misbehavior. We obviously had the Terrible-Twos misbehavior phase which for us started when she was 18 months and lasted until she was 3.5y, more or less when she started speaking better. Eventually - and somehow - I managed to change a couple of things in the way we were doing things and, more importantly, I changed MYSELF. We rose victorious! We had 1.5 years of a blessed, peaceful family living!

I don’t want to say that this lull period is over yet! Like I said, this new misbehavior phase is pretty recent and it doesn’t look as bad as the Terrible-Twos did and actually were. It might be that Rebecca is just bored. But even when I manage to fill her day with lots of activities that both Rebecca and Nico love, which actually happened quite often during this summer, like going to the swimming pool, going to the museum, going to the playground, having fast-food  for lunch or dinner, going out for ice-cream, buying their favorite snacks and desserts, blowing soap-bubbles, getting them a lot of art supplies and activity books, Rebecca still might act disrespectfully and be ungrateful at the end of the day! She’s gotten an attitude, and she is acting disobedient and defiant.

That really bothers me! But I guess what really takes me off tracks is when Rebecca and Nico fight with each other or – even more – when Rebecca ends up hurting Nico when they are playing roughly and too agitatedly specially when I have been repeatedly telling her NOT TO JUMP ON MOMMY’S BED!!! And not to drag Nico into it! And not to hurt him!!!!!

When one of these events happens, I lose it! I don’t spank (except in very rare cases and not without a lot of previous warnings) but I do scream! Especially when I am PMSing. I hate it! I feel like the worst person on the planet! It’s terrible this sensation that you acted like a crazy woman. And most importantly, I am afraid of scarring my children for life. It is not fair to them, I know this. I really wish I could always be cool and actually think before yelling.

Anyway, on tuesday – talking to my private counselor, my mom – I knew I had to come up with a new plan, for this new challenge. I knew I could do it! And just in time, tuesday was my recollection day! I know, I know!!! I always mention my recollections like they are my savior, but it truly makes a huge impact on my life! I will need these recollections as long as I am alive! Well, the last recollection not only it wasn’t an exception to the rule, but it surpassed by A LOT!!!

On an usual evening of recollection we have two meditations ministered by an Opus Dei priest. In the middle of these, we have a “talk” given by a lay person and then some questions for an examination of conscious going over the evening’s theme. Confession times are available throughout the entire time and the Recollection ends with a Benediction (Adoration).

Even when I don’t find the meditations to be much an insight, or when I am too tired to focus my attention and I don’t absorb much content, I consider the night a win when I get to go to confession! Yesterday they didn’t have a second priest to help with confessions so I didn’t get to go because the line of people before me was too long. The “talks” are usually good, with lots of practical advice, but it is not my favorite part, by any means! Maybe because I rarely find something new! Of course,  even when it is something you have heard many times before, it is still useful to be reminded of them from time to time, anyway!

So do you want to guess what happened? The “talk” was the gold of yesterday’s recollection! It was too much of a coincidence! The theme of the “talk” was precisely about educating and disciplining our children in virtues!!!! And it started just ok, I guess. The person giving the talk is usually a bit uncomfortable lecturing to a bunch of people more or less like herself, as she clearly thinks and acknowledges that she is no master on the subject either. I am not sure if it pains me to watch the first five minutes of it, or the opposite, if I actually enjoy observing this pattern over and over again.

Anyway! Maybe is all in my head! Maybe she is not really thinking any of it, but I just suppose she is, or maybe it’s because I’m too proud to simply sit down for the talk, with no judgements, and no pre-conceived ideas and just reap the good information! Fortunately, I still can get through the initial moments and start jotting down good pieces of advice on my journal! And that’s what I did! Actually, when I start writing on my journal I usually can’t stop until the talk is over! Even if it’s something I have made notes about a hundred times before!

It was going more or less like this: me-non-stopping-writing on my journal, when she stopped her line of thought to mention the example of her friend! Well, that’s always refreshing! It is really something she got out from her experience, and not only her knowledge! I will try to reproduce her words.

“I know a family. They have five children! You know that family that the kids are…. so beautiful! So well behaved!! Well, when I was a young mom and she was a young mom, we were talking about how to discipline our children. And I was saying how many rules we got, that we have to do this and this. And she stopped me and said: in my house we only have two rules! Cheerfulness and Obedience.”

And then she added that along the way, as she was trying to see what works and what doesn’t work for her family, she often realized how almost everything would go back to expect our children to be cheerful and obedient at home!
_________________________

(Final Part)

On the next day after my recollection, the PMS wasn’t over yet, but I was different somehow! I had my hopes high again, and at the breakfast table I told Dan about what I have heard at recollection and that I wanted to apply “cheerfulness and obedience” immediately with Rebecca! He agreed and we openly talked to Rebecca about the new two rules of our house! She understood and she was excited!!! 

And it worked!!!

Cheerfulness and obedience are the two rules for the children but I also would like to add two rules for the parents! Mommy and daddy, or nana, or teacher, or anyone who is charge of some authority need these extra two rules, but to apply to themselves, when disciplining children! They are: being loving but firm. I highly believe in the efficiency of these four rules combined!

Finally, I would like to end with a few words that my mom found on facebook and shared with me. The picture below was also included on the post and it reminded me SO much of Rebecca and I together! She loves to touch my hair! And the girl in the picture is just like Rebecca’s size and all! It was just too perfect! Here are the wise words:


"Breathe. You'll be a mother for all your life.
Teach the important things. The truth.
To jump puddles, to watch the animals,
to give butterfly kisses and to hug very strongly.
Do not forget to hug and don’t ever deny it.
Maybe in a few years, the hugs you will miss
Will be the ones you didn’t give.
Tell your child how much you love her, every time you think about it.
Let her use her imagination. Imagine together with her.
Walls can be painted again,
things that are broken can be replaced.
But the mother's screams will remain.
You can often do the dishes later.
While you clean, they grow.
She doesn’t need many toys. Work less and love more.
Less gifts and more presence! And, above all, breathe.
You will be a mother for all your life. 
She will be a child only once. " (Unknown Author)